The Abandoned | Wild Hogs | The Number 23 | Zodiac
Reno 911!: Miami | Amazing Grace | Black Snake Moan
Shooter | The Astronaut Farmer | Inland Empire

Shooter

So Mark Wahlberg is living in the backwoods of wherever with his old lady and dog who can fetch them beers with no slobber. He’s also growing The Worst Beard Ever and he used to be a Marine sniper. Not just a Marine sniper, but one of the best Marine snipers in the world! Someone wants to grease the president, but IT’S A SET UP! And they give Marky Mark the hucklebuck!

So Wahlberg has 2 slugs in him and says fuck this shit! I left my dog that fetches beers and secluded cabin in the woods to get a screw job from Danny Glover!?! Oh, hell no! I’d probably take this shit lying down from Morgan Freeman and I MIGHT take this from Christopher Plummer, but there’s no way in hell I’m taking this crap from Mel Gibson’s sidekick! So with the help of his oddly attractive girlfriend, Wahlberg goes after the top levels of government in ways that might make Matt Damon weep. All I know is if you don’t eat at least 3 pounds of raw red meat before or after you see this movie you’re a pussy. And Jesus hates pussies. He hates them dead.

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