looking forward to this election like we'd look forward to a hemorrhoidectomy.
That's because George Bush is probably going to win. He's either going
to win outright and Kerry will humbly concede, or he's going to rig
or steal it in a squeaker, resulting in Kerry and the Democrats putting
up a meek fight before humbly conceding. The electorate, at least those
that were so passionate about anybody-but-Bush, will cry, whine a lot,
accept it, lick their wounds and crawl back into their cubicles of prefabricated
contentment, preferring to get an early start on their Christmas shopping.
victors, on the other hand, will be intolerable. The right wing politicians
and the talking head flatterers in the media will proclaim a mandate
for the new American century of Bushonian democracy. It won't matter
that this mandate consisted of the support of about 25% of the voting
public with the vast majority of them being drooling fundamentalist
Christian whackos. These Christian soldiers of God and their enablers
will revel in the belief that their convictions have been confirmed.
Reality will have left the building. Welcome to the world of the living
dead pod people.
the fundies, reality is not something you discern but something you
choose, as in "I choose to believe that George Bush is an instrument
of God's grand plan and thus he can do no wrong." If the world
is destroyed in a horrific nuclear holocaust, they'll think "his
will be done."
can't argue with that logic and you're a fool to try. The only thing
you can do is fight them. Legal constraints prevent you from killing
them, but can still take action. As New York state residents, you can't
do much about Bush vs. Kerry except ratchet up the popular vote count,
but there are politicians right here that support Dubya and his legion
of doom, and are therefore prime targets for your wrath. We need to
make sure the Bushies have as little support as possible by casting
votes against those who support Bush. Hopefully we'll be able hold them
back enough to live to fight another day.
Even if Bush wins, we in Western New York have a chance to deprive him
of a couple of pawns in his holy war. Most important are two congressional
races where you have the ability to deny seats to Republican slimeballs
who will do anything Bush wants. You can only vote for one congressional
candidate, so you'll have to check what district you're in. We do, however,
encourage you to vote as often as possible.
the 27th District, Brian Higgins is the Democrat. He needs to defeat
the Republican corporate Bush-lover Nancy Naples. She took a ton of
money from the likes of Texas congressional asshole Tom Delay. Delay
is probably the vilest congressman in the country. He is raving born
again Christian who used to be a bug exterminator, and he's more corrupt
than Nero. He'd like to exterminate you, and will have Naples to help
him if you don't stop her by voting for Higgins. Higgins sucks way too
much political dick for us, but he is still much better than the slime
Naples makes him out to be. Naples main charge against Higgy is he voted
to raise taxes-but she fails to mention it was to make up for the huge
financial hit the state took after 9/11. He is better than her if only
for the reason that he won't suck Bush/Dick and Naples will spend her
entire term with her face in their laps. Besides, anyone who pulls his
pants up that high can't be all that slick.
the 26th District you have Jack Davis the Democrat vying to defeat ass-faced
Republican cretin Tom Reynolds. Reynolds is so far up the ass of Bush
and Cheney he hasn't seen himself in years. This pig needs to go down
and anything you can do to help will be a taking a weapon out of the
Republican juggernaut's arsenal. Davis is a former Republican but he
is a lesser evil we'd love to hate as opposed to the despicable shit
that is Tom Reynolds.
as crucial as the two races above is the 28th District because Democratic
incumbent Louise Slaughter should win easily. Be smart, folks, and get
out and vote for her to make sure. The douchebag she's running against
is an ex-Pentagon Sergeant Slaughter-wannabe from Rochester named Michael
Labia. Maybe when this asshole loses he'll volunteer to go to Iraq and
get his useless head blown off.
far as the State races go, there are a couple of Bush-infected Republican
zombies that need to be eliminated. In the Senate, the first is the
61st District, where we've got decent UB Professor Democrat Frank Longo
against longtime Republican serving wench Mary Lou Rath. We'd call Rath
a Stepford wife because she was always the tool of her perennial Republican
asshole husband Ed Rath, but Ed had the good sense to die earlier this
year. Give her the heave and maybe she'll do us a favor and soon join
hubby.In the 62nd District, vote for Democrat Matthew Bova who is trying
to defeat Republican Pataki ass-bitch George Maziarz.
the Assembly, Democrat Jeff Bono needs to beat the Republican bitch
Sandra Lee Worthless in the 142nd District and in the 146th District
Democrat Fran Pordum is in a tough fight against retiring Republican
congressman Jack Quinn's kid. In the 148th District there is no challenger
to the wretched weenie incumbent Republican dweeb Jimmy Hayes. We suggest
pounding on the voting machine and wailing "Why? You Bastards!
Why?" until you have to be forcibly removed from the premises.
Another race for which this tactic is appropriate is Erie County District
Attorney, where everyone apparently agrees that Frank Clark is doing
an excellent job. Wink-wink, scratch-scratch, ain't democracy grand?
Cast a write-in vote for Paul Fallon in protest.
but not least, you might consider voting for judges. There are only
three you should support. In the Supreme Court race you can vote for
three, but don't. Just vote for two: Paula Feroleto and James McLeod.
The rest of them are worthless hacks. Two of the judges running are
heinous collaborators. They been sleeping with the enemy and as such
deserve your scorn, not your vote. They are John Curran, who actually
bent over for Republican chief Bob Davis and changed parties from Democrat
to Republican in order to insure a cushy judgeship. Is there a way to
wash that slime off? Joseph Glownia got in bed with Davis, but apparently
a handjob was all it took to satisfy the evil Republican bastards and
ensure his sweet deal. Way to stand up for your convictions, guys. In
the Family Court race, vote for Marge Olszewski Szczur, because anyone
with a name like that needs your sympathy.
about it. We know that we're being very one-sided, but when you have
such demented sociopaths in the oval office and controlling Congress,
drastic measures are in order. We truly hate both parties for their
lies and corruption. We just want to go back not to worrying about dying
in some apocalyptic religious event. The Democrats are totally reprehensible,
and we dream of a day when we can go back to bashing them. The DNC Chairman
is probably the vilest scum-sucking politician around, but at least
he's not a religious fanatic, and that means something. We'd like to
go back to not sending out kids to die for fossil fuels and having the
FBI leave us alone when we want to smoke a little weed. Getting rid
of the Republican whackos and their accomplices leading the country
is a small but essential start. If you don't vote, it nullifies your
right to bitch for the next four years-and believe us, there'll be plenty
of bitching to do. Get off your ass November 2nd and do what you can
to save us all from the worst of these aristocratic swine and their