Issue #65
Download Entire issue (23mb PDF)
Features:
HThe Disaster is 20 Years Young! - Matt Taibbi
Sleeping With the Fishes: Fear Not, Buffalo--Corporate Welfare Will Save You! - Chris Abbey
No Moore Dissent: DLC Targets Populism, Man-Boobs- Matt Taibbi
Drowning the Scorpion: Debating a Neocon- Stan Goff
Condoleezza Rice is Going to Lick Your Beaver- Matt Taibbi
Bush Refuses to Pardon Turkey, Execution Proceeds as Scheduled
Kmart, Sears Merge to Create One Big Failure - Josh Righter
The Straight Dope w/ Dr Rotten
Entertainment:
Movie Reviews:
Music Reviews :
MF Doom - Ketchup Samurai
Sports:
Wide Right: Bills Still Have a Shot at 5th Super Bowl Loss - Ronnie Roscoe
I Witless News - I. Gonzalez
Deep Fried - Jason Yungbluth
Bob the Angry Flower - Stephen Notley
Issue #64
Download Entire issue (31mb PDF)
Features:
Happy Bhopal to You: The Disaster is 20 Years Young! - Matt Taibbi
Sleeping With the Fishes: Fear Not, Buffalo--Corporate Welfare Will Save You! - Chris Abbey
No Moore Dissent: DLC Targets Populism, Man-Boobs- Matt Taibbi
Drowning the Scorpion: Debating a Neocon- Stan Goff
Condoleezza Rice is Going to Lick Your Beaver- Matt Taibbi
Bush Refuses to Pardon Turkey, Execution Proceeds as Scheduled
Kmart, Sears Merge to Create One Big Failure - Josh Righter
The Straight Dope w/ Dr Rotten
Entertainment:
Movie Reviews:
Music Reviews :
MF Doom - Ketchup Samurai
Sports:
Wide Right: Bills Still Have a Shot at 5th Super Bowl Loss - Ronnie Roscoe
I Witless News - I. Gonzalez
Deep Fried - Jason Yungbluth
Bob the Angry Flower - Stephen Notley
Issue #63
Download Entire issue (18mb PDF)
Features:
Top Ten Hacks of 2004 Election - Matt Taibbi
MEMRI Problems: Was Kerry's Election Bid Lost in Translation?- Chris Riordan
Pick of the Litter: Bottom-Feeding all the Way to the Top
Redwoods Evil, Must Be Destroyed: Bush Wants Some Wood- Kit Smith
Too Cool for School: City Honors Censorship - Al Uthman
Tortures - R - Us - Christopher Lord
New Hotel on Baltic Ave: Boon or Burden? - Ian Murphy
10 Tips For Coping with your Dysfunctional Family this Thanksgiving
The Straight Dope w/ Dr Rotten
Entertainment:
Movie Reviews:
Music Reviews :
Matchbook Romance/Midtown Show - Chris Meister
Goo Goo Dolls DVD - Seamus Gallivan
Elliot Smith CD- Michael Gildea
Odd Couple CD - Ketchup Samurai
Sports:
Wide Right: Bills could Make Playoffs--in the NFC - Ronnie Roscoe
Beast Comix - Ian Murphy
I Witless News - I. Gonzalez
Deep Fried - Jason Yungbluth
Bob the Angry Flower - Stephen Notley
© 2004 The Beast
M.F. Doom
MM...Food?As a fan of MF Doom, I can't stress enough the importance of keeping an open mind to what Doom is kicking lyrically. Whether it's MF Doom, Viktor Vaughn, Madvillain, King Geedorah, or his pre-metal face days in KMD, Doom has consistently brought to the table a backpack of unique lyrics. Some might say Doom is from another planet and his rhymes are the proof, while others simply believe Doom is ever so close to getting the underground hip hop scene to a place of world wide recognition. I, for one, have always maintained that MF Doom is a dope emcee regardless of whether hip hop listeners find Doom to be wack. Now that, my friends, is the pot calling the kettle black. While MF Doom may not be played anytime soon on mainstream radio, he'll certainly have rotation on my show, and in my disk player of choice.
Now that my intro is out of the way, let me tell you about MF Doom's latest release entitled "MM..Food?" The album is 14 tracks, which includes a lot of skits that, though funny, are a sure sign of album filler. Tracks like "Beef Rapp," "Hoe Cakes," and my favorite "Potholderz (feat. Count Bass-D)," are solid enough to ignore the few skits and enjoy a solid album. I like this album and recommend it to underground hip hop heads searching for something different to listen to. The beats are nice, and the lyrics are interesting to say the least. 3.5 out of 5 tomatoes.
- Ketchup Samurai
Chris Abbey
What do dying urban centers need to keep them afloat when everything and everyone has long since moved out to the suburbs? A gimmick, of course, like the Arch in St. Louis or, even cooler, a Rock ’n’ Roll Hall of fame like Cleveland has! Too bad those ideas were already taken, and the only thing our leaders could think of is resurrecting the long dead Aud and turning it into a massive Bass Pro outdoor shop, along with a hotel and restaurant.
Matt Taibbi
THE BHOPAL DISASTER had its 20th anniversary last week, and so was duly (and briefly) commemorated in the inside sections of a few American newspapers.
It is unlikely, however, that any public figures are going to pay tribute to what happened 20 years ago this week. Which is too bad, because as far as America is concerned, the week of Dec. 9 to 16 was the more important week of the Bhopal disaster. That's when we got over Bhopal.
Stan Goff
When I was first invited by Dr. Stephen Smith to speak at Winthrop University in South Carolina, I was preparing a trip to Haiti and I didn't give much thought to how I would handle the engagement. I'd just finished being pole-axed by a bout of Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever and it was everything I could do to just pull the Haiti trip together. So I didn't pay much attention to the person who would appear with me - one Patrick Clawson - to represent "the other side" in a forum/debate billed as "What Next in Iraq? A Post-Election Perspective."
Seeing your last rag/magazine complaining about the last Presidential elections made me laugh. You commies have nothing better to do but insult our President, our country and our troops. You all should go back and help your fellows brothers in the Ukraine, where there really was a corrupted and stolen election.
The Top 10 Hacks of the 2004 Election
Matt Taibbi
10 - GEORGE WILL, NEWSWEEK: Will uses big words and pompous literary references to dress up what are basically the brutish and vulgar thinking patterns of a non-union meat-packing plant owner. He is a pig in a lace hat.
Chris Riordan
Stranded from intellect and worthwhile rhetoric in Utica, NY for the last few months, I have made a habit of visiting political discussion boards online for a dose of informed bantering and arguing. I tend to gravitate towards conservative cyber communities because I generally prefer arguing to agreeing.
Pat Ragpicker
It's 4am on a winter night, and I'm parked on a dead end street near Kaisertown. It’s a secluded corner of the city I found by driving around aimlessly. I'm new to town, and penniless after buying my van with $700 I squirreled away the last time I got a paycheck. That was 7 months ago. Over those months, I managed to live off a few hundred bucks while sleeping in a warehouse closet and helping some friends make a TV show to try selling to a network.
Redwoods Evil, Must be Destroyed
Kit Smith
Nature is a bad and inconvenient thing. It must be stopped. That's why so many of us environmental scientists voted for Bush. He recognizes that endangered species are tasty, that Yellowstone is the most awesome place for snowmobiling in the whole world, and that those horrible California Redwoods are home to Satan himself.
Al Uthman
In the decomposing cesspool of Buffalo's public schools, City Honors has long been regarded as something of a gem. In fact, it is widely regarded as the best school the city has to offer, with the brightest kids around.
Christopher Lord
Iraqis wondering what the next phase of the Republicans' invasion of their country will bring should consider El Aguacate airstrip in Honduras. In 2001, 185 bodies were dug up there: the victims were the 'terrorists' and 'enemies of democracy' of the day.
Al Uthman
It's time to face some unpleasant facts, Buffalo. This country may not be the best place for us anymore. On November 2nd, we all bore witness to a terrible turning point in our history; a bad lifestyle choice, if you will. We had the chance to reject the increasing madness of our nation's leadership, their blind march to pointless war and craven desire to take advantage of us in every manner conceivable, and we blew it. America has spoken, and it said "duh."
Matt Taibbi
...If history is any guide, the DLC will spend the next four years trying to find a pious bomb-thrower to put up as the nominee- unless, of course, the poll numbers in a few years' time show that Barack Obama is good-looking, black and charming enough to get the party over the hump using the same basic playbook that worked so swimmingly this time.
10 Ultra-cynical Ways to Beat the Republicans
Why did the Democrats lose? At least in part, it's because they thought that being right would actually work in their favor. Let's face it, logic doesn't mean squat in politics. People say there's too much cynicism in politics today, but we think there really isn't enough. Cynicism works. The Republican Party has embraced it, and it has worked wonders for them. The Democrats have made some progress in this area, but they are still lagging badly. If there's any hope for the blue states, they must learn the lessons of Machiavelli and Rove. To help them along, the BEAST offers these suggestions.
Sleeping
With the Fishes
Happy
Bhopal to You
Drowning
the Scorpion
MEMRI
Problems 
Pick
of the Litter
Too
Cool for School
Tortures-R-Us
O
Buffalo 
Love
or 4-Hour Erections