| •
Ooooooh, that’s it right there! It feels so good—but
we can’t afford another baby Charles, so remember
to pull out—oh god yes! |
•
Shhhhhhhh! Don’t talk about kids for Christ’s
sake—oh yeah you like that? You like that? I will
pull out when I’m ready, okay baby? Grrrrrrrrrrrrr! |
| •
Oh yeah growl big poppa, growl! Me likey, oooh—yes,
yes! You just have to remember to pull out this time,
I am NOT about to have another child at my age! |
•
Please, Beth! I will. I promise. Let’s just try
to enjoy this and stop talking so much. I don’t
want a baby anymore than you do—dirty girl, oh yeah
who’s my dirty girl? Who’s my dirty girl? |
| •
I’m your dirty girl, oh yeah I’m your dirty
girl! Oh sure—you promised that three years ago,
remember? And now we have Casey. Charles, I am done having
babies! What about our golden years? It’s bad enough
we have a three-year-old. Oh-oh-oh—what’s
the matter honey? |
•
What the hell do you think is the matter? I’m trying
to make love to you and you won’t stop jawing on
about kids for god’s sake! Can’t we ever do
anything without you talking all the time? |
| •Oh
honey, I’m sorry. Come to momma. I will make it
all better—ooo yeah there’s my big boy-come
on baby. What’s wrong? |
•
It’s not working! That’s what wrong. No not
like that, like this—do it like this. No here, like
this! Oh—Ok-now we’re talking. Yeah, just
pinch it a little. Oww! Too hard. That’s it baby—right
there, baby. |
| •
Speaking of babies, Charles, we are both too old to be
changing diapers again. And with my business just starting
to take off, that is the last thing we need right now.
Right here? Like that? You like it rough, don’t
you big poppa? |
•
Jesus Christ, Beth! Progress is being made here and all
you can talk about is pulling out. I have said it before
and I will say it again—I will only pull out when
the mission is complete! Gaaaaaaar! |
| •
Yeah, bite me—bite it—I’m all for accomplishing
the task at hand Charles—oh yeah—there, right
there, harder—but immediate withdrawal is our only
prudent option at this juncture. Another child would throw
our lives into a, a—oh yeah, spank me like you mean
it—virtual quagmire. |
•
[SMACK!] By calling for immediate withdrawal you are sending
the wrong message to our troops, and by troops I mean
my genitals. Morale is low as it is, and applying pressure
to the situation now may very well hinder “troop”
deployment in the future. |
| •
I’m all for a strong, hard and—deeper, oh
yes—military and I believe in accomplishing the
mission but why not set out a time table to get our troops
out of there before it is too late! |
•
Look, look what you did! You think it turns me on to hear
you jabber on like that? |
| •
Should I put in that movie I bought? |
•
No! |
| •
Why not? Why are you so closed-minded? I thought it might
spice up our sex lives. Jill told me her and Drew do it
all the time; it helps with Drew’s problem. |
•
I don’t care what Jill and Drew do; I’m not
Jill and Drew! Jill and Drew can get off fucking porcelain
ponies for all I care! And I am not the one with the problem,
Miss Won’t Shut Up. |
| •
Well honey, something’s the matter. Did you ever
talk to your doctor like we talked about? This is our
problem, not just yours or mine. |
•
Goddamn it Beth, can we not talk about this right now! |
| •
Well when, Charles, when? Just tell me when and I’ll
clear some time, OK? |
•
Oh fucking great, here comes the sarcasm—don’t
you roll your eyes at me—oh what? I’m not
man enough for you, is that it? Well maybe you should
go back to Greg! |
| •
You know what? Fuck you! That was five years ago and you
never fail to throw it back in my face. You know, maybe
I should—at least Greg knew how to satisfy a woman! |
•
My mother was right; you are an evil bitch! No, get off
of me—I don’t have time for this bullshit.
I’m sleeping in the living room. |
| •
Fine! Go! I just hope the living room is far enough away
that I can’t hear you breathing! |
•
Fine, I’ll go to a fucking hotel! |
| •
Fine! |
•
Fine! |
