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March 2008
ISSUE #124

Issue 122 Cover Small


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Features

Bait & Switch
Freely trading lies for votes
Allan Uthman

Dirty Rock
Jay Rockefeller is a jerk
Alexander Zaitchik

Fuck the Troops
Someone had to say it
Ian Murphy

Suck my Jong
Old cunt attacks Matt Taibbi
Allison Kilkenny

The Urge to Surge
Bhagwan Petraeus returns!
Stan Goff

AIDS Wolf on Murder Night
Includes a brief mention of some band!
Steve Gordon

Bring on the Boycott
Anything to avoid the Olympics
Michael J. Smith

Fauxtures

No, I am Not Fucking Bitter
A rural PA voter speaks out

The Virgin Suicides
A NEWSBEAST exclusive from Muslim Paradise
Evan Thomas

Words that Jerk
It's not what you say, it's what people fear
Frank Luntz

This BEAST in Science
This Issue's Election Science: The Clintonian Uncertainty Principle, The Truth/Outrage Obameter

Obama Offers Clinton Nomination for Cigarette
Scott Borchert

Departments

The Beast Page 5
Cheney Sunglesses-Reflection Ambiguity

Kino Kwikees: Movie Trailer Reviews

BEAST-O-Scopes
Your completely accurate horoscope

[sic] - We ridicule your letters

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	ARCHIVES - PAST ISSUES - 2007-08

2007 | 2006 | 2005 | 2004 | 2002




		ISSUE# 126 May 2008 Bait & Switch Fuck the Troops Dirty Rock				ISSUE# 125 April 2008 The Icewoman Cometh! Last Tangle in Persia The Wright Stuff
		ISSUE# 124 March 2008 The BEAST Guide to Women's History Immune to Reality Hard Ballin' with Chris Matthews				ISSUE# 123 February 2008 Primary Fever! Dumb as Dixie Anbar Province: Vacation with Us!
		ISSUE# 122 January 2008 The BEAST 50 Most Loathsome People in America, 2007 Stop Being an Asshole The War on the War on				ISSUE# 121 December 2007 Political Shrinkage: Clinton the castrator induces pundit panic God Hates Women: Feminism & Religion don't mix The Gift of Graft: Corruption will save us
		ISSUE# 120 November 2007 Mind-boggling Political Illusions! Ghostbusters: Dems cross streams in Turkey Pastor John Hagee Launched on Iranian Nuclear Facility				ISSUE# 119 Seotember/October 2007 Larry Craig's guide to restroom hand gestures Fred Certain: Thompson's idiot appeal LOLNews
		ISSUE# 118 August 2007 The Avalanche Threat Mr. BEAST goes to Washington An Inconvenient Douche				ISSUE# 117 June/July 2007 Let there be Retards: Special Times at the Creation Museum Those Lazy Iraqis Ghosts of HST & Tim Leary
		ISSUE# 116 May/June 2007 The BEAST Guide to Campus Massacres Inexcusaably offensive! Battle of the Network Stars Interview w/ Michael Parenti				ISSUE# 115 April 2007 President Rubber vs. Speaker Glue In Defense of Ann Coulter? The BEAST Last Minute Tax Guide & Civil Disobedience Primer



		ISSUE# 114 February 2007 Schlep Boys Failing forward in one act The Britney Budget Eeny, Meeny, Miny, Moe Blogger and journalist Brad Friedman of The Brad Blog on the hijacking of democracy				ISSUE# 113 January 2007 The 50 Most Loathsome Americans 2006 Our annual ode to awfulness. Power Surge Bush blows a fuse! Chattin' with Chomsky We e-mailed him & he wrote back!


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